Kicking And Screaming To The Ren Faire

I think Michael pouted a little bit when I put the Renaissance Festival on our list. He may have said something along the lines of, “All we are going to see are people who do not belong in corsets wearing corsets.” And then I mentioned meat on sticks, and he was kind of more responsive to the idea.

The Pittsburgh Renaissance Festival, which is not actually held in Pittsburgh (it’s out the Turnpike a ways), is really a lot of fun. I’ve been several times, and one year, as I had a Ren-Faire-appropriate dress lying around, I even dressed up. This year, so as to save my husband years of embarrassment (and also because I no longer wear the tiny size I did in high school), I did not. But we still had fun!

Here is the entrance to the festival, where people immediately begin to heckle you. Basically, you get heckled the entire time you are at the Ren Faire. It’s part of the charm!

First on the list, of course, was food. Michael got sausage and steak on a stick, and he was quite happy. Later, he had an alligator jerky stick, but ate it so fast, there is no picture to prove it.

While we were enjoying our food, we watched the Pirate Show, which was hilarious, if a bit inappropriate at times. Little did we know how inappropriate the day would get…

The next show we stopped in for was the German Brothers’ Rap Show. We were getting heckled as soon as we sat down, and the show wasn’t starting for another fifteen minutes! Inappropriateness abounded!

And here they are, in the middle of their classic hit, “Schnitzel Control” (think of Prince songs that end in ‘control’ for that one…). Wow. They also talked a lot about weiners. I cannot remember the last time I laughed so hard.

Next, Michael decided to test his strength. He was pretty badass, I have to say!

And then it was time for Archery. Michael was slightly better at this than I was…

…which was pretty pathetic! Clearly, I am a druid and not a hunter! If this had been ‘beat-your-enemies-with-a-stick-and-a-dagger-y,’ I would have done so much better.

And then, I spent all of my remaining dollars on this cute pair of horns, so I could do a Lady Gaga ‘paws up’ in them (we went to the concert that evening after we got home).

And my gracious mum loaned me a few dollars so I could indulge in a funnel cake. And then Lucy ate my horns when we got home. Claaaaaasic Lucy!